Night Terrors…Yes, on top of all my other issues. I get night terrors. Any one else out there in hypochondria land suffer from night terrors???
I’ve been experiencing these at irregular intervals since (the earliest I can remember) 1990 ish. It’s got to be a little unsettling for BF, (and my ex-husband before him, and my previous ex-boyfriend, before him) since I wake up yelling my fucking head off. BF tells me there are times when I go through bouts of night terrors and wake up yelling almost every night during the week. I honestly don’t remember it EVER happening that much. Thank God for small favors!
I know it happened two nights in a row last week though. I began taking my Prozac again as a result.
Its’ like WHAM!! There I am in the face of mortality. Wide awake and yelling. It doesn’t involve specific disease fears, just my fear of death. Even death by old age…but it’s like suddenly I’m 90 and it’s an immediate reality. It’s like the Grim Reaper scene in Monty Python’s “The Meaning of Life.” The vision of the death approaching in film edits before the family dies from eating the tainted salmon casserole is truly one of the most frightening movie images ever!
Yes, it was probably just spoofing Bergman. But that doesn’t matter, it’s still scary!
The passing of time frightens me just as much as any illness out there. The passing of time IS the ultimate disease. It may not be the BEST reason to start going to church, but it is definitely in the top ten.
5 comments:
Night Terrors? Holy shit. Now I really have something to look forward to. It's not often I hear of a new disorder, but when I do, it's not long before I have it.
And I completely agree with you, time is not our friend.
No night terrors, but I do get middle of the night anxiety attacks. And the mortality thing is very familiar. Did I mention turning 50 last winter? Yeah, the whole death thing just doesn't seem so far off any more. It is not making for a peaceful life.
Funny, just today I was wishing I believed in heaven. Is church giving you any comfort with this?
Heaven, wow! Having the faith of a child would be wonderful! I’m not that blessed.
I must admit that going back to church has been a good thing for me though.
I do believe that whatever unknowable reality awaits me after death is a more perfect reality that the one I am living in now and in good moments, I can give up struggling with it. I’m also learning to focus more on other people in a more sincere way although this is difficult for me. I tend to like living inside myself too much even though I know by now the kinds of trouble this can lead to.
At mass, I really enjoy the part of the Lord’s Prayer where the priest says, “…Release us from sin and free us from all anxiety as we wait in joyful hope for the coming of our Lord.” I may not exactly be waiting in “joyful” hope just yet, but I can really get into the “free us from all anxiety” part!
Pretty scarey stuff, huh! My husband has night terrors and goes running down the hall sometimes, jumps up and hovers over me yelling, it is scarey, I try to keep sharp objects out of the room. But if I talk to him, he calms down and goes back to sleep, doesnt' remember. My son used to have them, just screaming fits, and the doctor said to put his feet in cold water. It worked. Also don't sleep in socks and uncover your feet.
i get night terrors i have had them since 1998 i think, and there are some i remeber, i went to a sleepover at a freinds house and she said like half an hour after i went to sleep i started moaning and shouting at something and i opened my eyes but i was still sleeping and i woke up shouting my head off and crying like mad and i kept trying to strangle myself, and like you it is the grim reaper, clowns and the devil now im too scared to even sleep.
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